complex.

staring at my enemy

in the mirror

i've avoided you

for so long

thanking the tears

for blurring my image

and trying to

protect me

from the shame

and all

that apologies

cannot fix

this uneasy feeling

i get at dusk

as the landscape changes

without me

my veins are tired

from all the bad blood

that passes through them

all that i could have

and should have done

and the chances

i will never have again

like footprints in sand

they are washed away

and it doesn't matter

i honestly never wanted more

than to be happy

and as i stripped away

the means

i learned the truth

and that

it just doesn't work

that way

when you smile

it makes me smile

but it is fleeting

and again

i find myself

lost in the desert

alone

knowing

it doesn't have to be

this way

it

just

is

...