there are things about me
that you'll never know
it's not that i wouldn't tell you
but i'm quite certain
you'll never ask
such ugly questions
so many important moments
so many
beautiful experiences
missed
leaving shotgun holes
in my life
while i was being foolish
making choices
i didn't want to make
making mistakes
ruining everything
and now time is having
it's way with me
i've learned to smile
a little
to find some happiness
in the little warmth
afforded to me
i don't know
whether i deserve it
or not
perhaps i'm numb
although
there is always pain
always suffering
it's always there
and there is no going back
maybe that's why
sad songs
make me feel
comfortable
maybe that's why
i can be thankful
for the small things
because i know
they are all
i'll ever have
...
