Preparation Fails...

Always thought that I would have the strength to rise above anything

After all I’ve been through & all I’ve seen – the preparation…

But I still avoid the street where it happened – the place eludes me

I held it all in to be strong for others – I never let it out

Set myself up for a big crash

Never understood the sentiment

Though I could beat it out of my mind

But now I know – I can never forget

And that human is human after all

I am one – I am one

My blood runs colder as I approach the crime scene

And as my hands start to shake – I am lost in that moment

Trained myself for so many years – not to be bitter – not to blame

Take it out on myself in private & be done with it

But as I found myself in that room freezing from the inside out

I can see what becomes of me

Never understood the sentiment

Thought I could beat it out of myself

But now I know – I can’t forget it

And that human is human after all

And that I am one – I am one

Staring at the threshold of what I can take

Just how much it would take to break me down

I’ve learned just how far logic can take me

Before it’s simply too much to justify

I start to crack & some can see it

 And as my age starts to show

I know I can never go back

Never understood the sentiment

Though I could beat it out of my mind

But now I know – I can never forget

And that human is human after all

I am one – I am one

When I hit the wall & bricks started to fall

I tried so hard to catch them all

But when I got spent I realized

That sometimes enough becomes too much